The feeling.

You know the feeling that you get when you accomplish something? Its like nothing can bring you down. You feel proud of yourself. What's better is that sometimes you make the people around you proud too.

But sometimes you mess up.

It sucks.

Wrap it all up and put a bow on top.

I have my last final today [and by today I mean tonight at 8pm]. Instead of studying for it like a good college student, I'm packing up to leave [and at this very moment blogging about it].

There is nothing on my walls anymore.

There are clothes and empty hangers all over my floor waiting to be packed away.

There are a few REALLY FULL trash bags that need to be taken out.

There is a bunch of random stuff on my bed and some on my desk that has no place.

There are a few sets of clothes laid out for me to use over the next few days and on the trek home.

While I dread the rest of this terrible packing process, I'm spending my time reminiscing on this past year.

When I was packing to come out here, I realized that even though I was excited, I dreaded the whole college experience. I knew I wouldn't have any money and I'd have to make all new friends and that I'd become close friends with guys only to send them on a mission and not see them for awhile [if at all]. I didn't want to leave my mom either. [Even though she's ridiculously nosy about my life and lives vicariously through me, she was still one of my closest friends.] I feared the road ahead of me. [Figuratively and literally, considering the 33 hour drive to Utah.]

When I sent my mom away on the plane, I cried. It was finally time for me to do my own thing. [Looking back, now I realize that it wasn't that hard because I know that she's always just a phone call away.] College was a HUGE adjustment. In high school, I had friends but outside of school I wasn't particularly social and I didn't go out much. Once I got here, I had to change that.

Now it's time to go and I'm looking back on all of the CRAZY things that have happened this year.

Here are a few things that I can think of [in no particular order]:

Walking back from the RB one Wednesday, Sarah and I ran into our friend Ray driving by in his Jeep. He rolled down the window and told us about a dance party that the boys in our ward were throwing that night. A bunch of us girls in the hall decided to go. We danced the night away and took loads of pictures. This was the night that we realized we had one of the best wards known to BYU.

Olivia, Sarah, Kazhia, Michelle, Shelby, and I went to play tennis in the RB. While we walked in the underground tunnel, we sang and screamed really loud... Then we realized people can hear us. Oops!

One night Sarah and I went to a dance with a bunch of other girls. We weren't feeling it so we left early. We called our friend Olivia and met up with her to hang out. The three of us were up almost all night singing and taking goofy pictures while we explored the dorms. "Momma get married today!"

The night after the first football game, a bunch of us decided to go to the bell tower to roast marshmellows. IT TURNED INTO THE BIGGEST MARSHMELLOW FIGHT OF MY LIFE! We also ran through sprinklers. And topped off the night by running back to the dorms in the pouring rain. SOAKING WET! Thats the night that Teddy accidentally stole Sarah's moose sweatshirt.

We also supported the Merrill Meansters at flag football games. Sarah and I were the team momma's and we never missed a game!

Sarah, Olivia, and I played around one night and we stuffed ourselves in the washers and dryers in the laundry room. Munchkin Sarah was the only one who fit completely.

For Halloween, my friend Dillon and I dressed up as Peter Pan and Tinker Bell. We looked super cute and I even convinced him to wear the green tights! We went trick-or-treating with Callie and Anna Marie. Afterwards we met up with some people and had a CRAZY dance party outside of Del Taco.

For Sarah's nineteenth birthday, we went black light bowling. CRAZY NIGHT! Her sister made the most glorious pumpkin chocolate chip muffins that I've ever experienced!

The first snow was on a Sunday and we took pictures while we walked up to church.

I went to the Candyland dance with Brent and Sarah went with Mitchell. ONE OF THE BEST NIGHTS OF OUR LIVES! I let Macey curl my hair and Haylee do my make up even though I never do anything special with hair or make up.

Sarah and I spent a lot of time going to the Tanner building with the 1200 boys. We also played in the snow with them and went to the dollar theatre MANY times over finals week.

I went to the Salt Lake City temple to see the Christmas lights with the ward. I spent the time with Sarah, Macey, Haylee, and Elliot. We took a ton of pictures that night while we were all dressed super cute, including engagement pictures with our polygamist husband, Elliot. "Please don't touch the natives."

I made sure I recycled every bottle I used. The first time Sarah and I recycled our many water bottles, the total came to 72. Now Sarah has a laundry basket where we put our bottles before we recycle. It really adds up.

Sunday nights at midnight was always a great time to get food. I had my first "In and Out" experience at this time. I also went to Ihop a few times and Denny's once.

For Elliot's birthday we wrapped up nineteen gifts for him then had a small celebration for him in the basement of Chipman. Later that night the boys had ice cream cake for him [which us girls went to eat].

7G1C! Inter-mural basketball for the 1200 boys. Sarah and I were their team momma's also. The first game we brought orange slices for them to eat. [I cut all the oranges with a plastic knife. That was really difficult.] One of their games, Sarah and I trash talked the other team the whole time. Yellow boy was my favorite to harass!

We went to various mission call openings in Merrill lobby. I'm so proud of all you boys!!

Girls night out! This semester we became good friends with HANNAH UTELY! We would drive around in her car blasting music and sing to the people in the cars around us.

PREFERENCE DANCE! We asked a bunch of boys to the girls choice dance. The plan was to go to the great gatsby dance [1920s attire] but we couldn't find all the right outfits so we all picked a decade to dress up as. When it came time to buy tickets to the dance they were all out. So we went to the Dr. Suess dance, but still dressed in our decades! After the dance we drove to Park City and spent the night at Hannah's aunts house. We woke up early the next morning to go to church.

I went and saw Princess and the Frog with my friend Chandeelore! [That's not his real name.] The next night we went again with some other people. The two of us quoted the movie the whole time. "She's the most beautiful firefly that ever did glow. EEEK!"

When Haylee's mom came to town a group of people went to the hotel to swim. IT WAS GREAT FUN! [even though Pat cut his head open and needed 14 staples.] After, we went to the cabin. Macy Baker and I had girl bonding time here while everyone was watching the movie.

I went to get a grilled cheese sandwich at the creamery with friends almost every night for about a month during winter semester. I'll miss that daily adventure.

I discovered that I'm so bad at cooking that I manage to ruin spaghetti. [UNFORTUNATE]

For April Fools Day, Macey, Haylee and I moved all of Sarah's stuff into the bathroom. Bed and everything. She was shocked when she got back and had no room!

OWL CITY CONCERT! [words can't describe the perfection.]

Sarah and I went to the Post Secret event at the University of Utah. Frank Warren is our hero.

Sarah, Haylee, and I went to see The Fellows play at the barn. THEY WERE AMAZING! There were also two other bands there who provided plenty of entertainment.

There is much more, but frankly I don't have time to keep writing because I'm going to IKEA with Sarah, Mike, and Topher!! Then I have to take my last test and finish packing.

It's been a good year, but now it's time to wrap it up and go home. I'll be back in four months!

"It's a beautiful day to save lives, people."

Today I finally decided to donate blood. Remember that fear of needles I mentioned in an earlier post? WELL I FINALLY FACED IT!

Here's the story.

I knew that today was the day for me to donate. I called the place that I was gonna go to on Saturday and found out the hours. Then today after I got up, ate breakfast, and showered, my sister came to get me [around 2:15] to head off to this premeditated service experience. We got there and I was FREAKING OUT. And by freaking out I mean not that much because I knew that it really isn't something to freak out over. I filled out a little form and answered a bunch of questions... The bottom line is that I don't have HIV.

THANK GOODNESS!

Then Greg [the guy who sucked my blood] took me to a room to check my temperature, blood pressure, and iron level [finger prick]. I heard that this is the worst part. We were just talking about my major and school when he put a little blue thing on my finger and pricked me. It started to bleed [I sort of felt like I was in a movie... which is weird.] Then he took some blood out of there and checked it out. It didn't hurt until after he was done testing the blood, then it just twinged [for lack of a word at all] a little bit. He told me that I'm healthy and that its time for me to donate.

We went out and he made me sit in this ridiculously comfortable blue chair. Then he checked my veins and found that my left arm would be perfect for the job. My sister sat in a chair next to me and held my hand. [That's kind of embarrassing but I'M SO AFRAID OF NEEDLES.] I thought I was gonna cry... but I didn't. Greg told me to tell him about who I thought were the top five most beautiful actors. I began.

"Hands down, Hugh Jackman, is first" Then I felt the needle go into my arm. It didn't hurt at all, so no worries. Greg told me that I may feel nauseous or light headed, but to just let him know if I did. Then he told me to continue my list while I bled. Shandi took a picture. Then I continued.

Second I said I love George Clooney. I said that Heath Ledger is beautiful in somethings, but not in my top five. Then I couldn't think of anymore at the time.

[I know now. Hugh Jackman, George Clooney, Robert Downey Jr., Patrick Dempsey, and John Krasinksi. But that's beside the point of this post.]

While I bled, he asked me how I was feeling. I said fine. Then I burst out laughing and couldn't stop. I don't know what I was laughing at, but I just laughed. [Weird out of body experience]

After I was done [apparently I bleed fast], I sat in a chair and ate goldfish and drank water. He had wrapped a purple band around my elbow [I chose purple over pink]. When I started to feel light headed, he made me put an ice pack on my neck. Once I was better, Shandi drove me back to my room.

[I drank a lot of water. And I've had to pee a lot.]

Sarah and I went outside and I just laid out and slept while she did homework. Then around 7pm, her sister, Anna, picked us up to go get Chinese food from Smiths. While we were standing in line, something scary happened to me. I was getting a headache and I felt a little nauseous so I put my hand on Sarah's shoulder. They told me to sit up on the counter because I was wobbling a little bit. I did. Then everything went black, I felt pressure on my head, and I slid off the counter. When my feet hit the floor colors came back. Then I wobbled again and sat down on the floor. I drank more water while sitting on the floor of the grocery store. Now my head really hurts and I still feel like I could throw up.Oh, and I'm really tired.

Even though I don't feel so great right now, I did an awesome thing. I can donate again on June 14th and I fully intend to. I think my mom and my sister will do it with me.

It's a beautiful day to save lives, people.

Sweat, Songs, and Secrets

Holy Love

I went to the Owl City Concert in Salt Lake City on Monday.

I can't even put into words how incredible it was. I went with a few pals from school [including Sarah...whose blog about this does the concert way more justice than I can]. She was surprised that this was my first concert ever... Which I guess is kind of weird?!? ooops :)

Anywho. The night began. We drove up with some other friends in a beautiful car. Then we got there and it had started raining, so Sarah and I popped out of the car and ran to will call. Once we were in we were standing in basically the back of the room. Lights played [we missed the first band] and post Lights, Sarah told me that we would make it the front... through the sea of heads... which were all attached to bodies... and were all standing extremely close to each other and pushing forward... apparently everyone wanted to be up front. imagine that! I didn't question her and we began our journey. As everyone pushed around, she and I snuck through the gaps and popped our way up to the front. [Its a good thing we're both so munchkin!] When we were more than half way through our journey, someone in the crowd started pushing more aggresively.. The whole crowd leaned over to one side.. then to the other. We were all literally standing at an angle ready to collapse into a pile of sweat.. Oh did I say we were all standing? Ignore that. I WAS OFF THE GROUND! Scariest thing of my life... because well I happen to be claustrophobic.. yyyyeaahhh...

Eventually Sarah faked a coughing fit and got us pushed up to the front:)

THEN WE PARTOOK IN THE MOST INCREDIBLE EXPERIENCE OF MY LIFE! Adam Young [lead singer and amazing] was up on stag and we were FRONT AND CENTER!

It was gloriously magical!

Then on Tuesday night was the GLEE season premiere. BEAUTIFUL! Sarah and I set up in the basement with a bunch of other people to watch it. NO TALKING ALLOWED!! This was a monumentous day. I loved the show... with one exception.. What the heck Mr. schuester?!

Enough said.

THEN LAST NIGHT!! Holy wow!! I went to the post secret convention with Sarah. And I can't describe it. Mostly because it was so amazing. And also because I'm sort of tired of typing. hahah. so yeah.

Basically the past three nights have been AMAZING!

The end.

Watch out for the little guy.

Walking to church today, I saw ten rollie pollies.

They scuttled across the ground avoiding death.

Imagine living life like that. Everywhere you go you're looking up for something bigger that might bring your pleasant life to an unfortunate end. Then once you die, no one gives you a funeral.

This is sad.

It's a good thing that this thought came into my mind. Lets not crush the small ones.

I saw a spider in my room the other day and I just let it be. He lives above the light over my sink. I named him Charles. Perhaps he's not there anymore, but perhaps he's living a long fulfilling life because I didn't squish him when I saw him.

We can apply this lesson to life also. Sometimes there are people who feel like they are struggling just to get by. They feel like everything they do, the weight of the world is waiting to crush them. We don't realize it, but everyone around us has times that they feel like that. When you smile at someone walking by you, nine times out of ten, their having a worse day.

So even though we may not recognize who's feeling like an underdog on a particular day, think of the rollie pollies, and try to watch out for the little guy.

Come Inside My Car...

When I was in second grade (at least I think it was second grade), I had an interesting experience. Remember that beautiful road, Pleasant Valley, that I talked about in a previous post? The experience happened on that road.

I was in the back of our little five passenger car driving with my mom, my best friend (Hilary), and Hilary's mom. As we were driving, we saw a man walking down the road. He looked like he was in his 50's (potentially older). So here's the deal with Pleasant Valley. Often people ride their bikes down the road, which is super dangerous and makes my mom mad to see. So when she saw someone walking there, she wasn't happy about it. She slowed down to his pace and rolled down her window. She asked him what he was doing. He said he was trying to walk to Ohio... WE LIVE IN VIRGINIA! Thats a six hour drive!! She stopped and unlocked the door.

"Why don't you get in, we'll make sure you get to Ohio."

Then we let the strange old man in our car.

Then we took him to our house.

Then my dad gave him some of his old clothes.

Then we let him take a shower.

Then he ate dinner with us.

Then he slept over.

Then we gave him one hundred dollars.

Then we bought him a bus ticket to Ohio.

That was the last we saw of him.

Is it weird at all that we let a complete stranger sleep over at a house with four young children?

Now I'm reminded of another "Come inside my car." story.

My biology professor told us today that weeks ago she saw a man walking in a blizzard. She pulled over and told him she'd give him a ride wherever he needed. He said he needed to get to the bus stop. They arrived at the stop, and when he got out of the car, he said "Thanks, I'll see you tomorrow!"

She's been driving him to the bus stop every morning for the past few months.

Okay now its my last story about cars.

Except its not a story. Its a statement.

When I have to drive somewhere and pick up my brothers from various activities, I always creepily inch up to where they are waiting, slowly roll down the window, and offer them candy if they will come inside my car.

I like to scare the adults that see them willingly get in the car with me.

Let's Be Friends.

I was walking to class today, when a stranger came up to me, looked at me in the eyes, then started walking next to me as if we knew each other. Anyone who saw us probably thought we already knew each other. I kept walking, waiting for him to say something because he had already acknowledged my existence. But he didn't say anything for probably the longest thirty seconds of my life. He finally got up the courage to start a conversation...

His starter caught me off guard..

Not the typical "Hi, I'm so and so." Instead he jumped right in the conversation without even asking my name. "How are you're classes going?"

REALLY?!

My initial shock wore off and I told him that they were "treating me alright, but I'm completely ready to be done with school."

Then we continued to talk about classes. Finally once that conversation was over, he asked my name. His name is Jordan. We shook hands [because that's what Mormons do].

I asked him if it was habit for him to introduce himself to complete strangers. He laughed and said that it makes life interesting.

We proceeded to talk about what we were studying in school, where we were from, and the state of my next class [because I'm not particularly fond of it].

Then he even asked about my summer plans [whether I would stay here or go back home]. I revealed that I have to work all summer so that I can come back to school next year and he told me that he was impressed that I'm working my way through college. I told him that its really no big deal, just part of life.

Then we talked about the class he was going to and realized that we both find war stories particularly intriguing.

He shook my hand again, and said it was nice to meet me, then we parted ways. I doubt I'll ever see him again, but I will admit that it was really exciting to just meet someone while walking to class.

I wish I had the courage that he does to go up to a stranger and say "Let's be friends."

The Price of Tea in China.

Following is the most recent proof that my brain is still functioning..

'Things I Look Forward To' Thoughts:

1.I'm going to the Owl City concert in a week from tonight and I AM EXTREMELY EXCITED!!

2.In three weeks from yesterday, my lovely sister and I shall pack up our necessities for the next four months, get in the car, and drive for 34 hours to the other end of the country. Hello Virginia, home sweet home:)

3.My best friend from elementary school is coming to visit me this weekend. I haven't seen this girl in FOREVER! Well I mean I saw her last semester briefly, but we haven't hung out in about three years... so yeah

4.On Wednesday, my sister and I are going to our friend's apartment to play video games. Now I realize that doesn't seem exciting, but these two boys that we're going to hang out with are two of the most hilarious entertaining people ever to leave Wyoming!

5. I have a choir concert on Sunday, which I'm rather excited for.

6. Tonight I sign up for classes for next fall!

7. GLEE starts next week!! HOORAY FOR SEASON TWO!!!!

Moment of nostalgia:

My sister and I were on Skype with my parents and one of my brothers on Saturday night. Gosh I remember before my sister left for college [my junior year of high school] and before my mom started working again when we'd have family dinner together. Often times we were rushing. With four kids who all lead extremely busy lives, we all always had places to be. Dinner would be quick. My family is used to eating fast. We could probably down a seven course meal in a half hour! Anywho, when dinner wasn't rushed, it was quite the event. We would still eat fast [because thats the way we are] but during dinner our conversation is HILARIOUS! All of us talk a lot... and fast too. We always talk about our least and favorite thing from that day. Which would lead to a MONUMENTOUS conversation full of movie lines, guessing games, silly laughs, plenty of snorts, and our favorite game of imitation [this is my imitation of dad. this is my imitation of micaela's imitation of dad. this is my imitation of garrett's imitation of micaela's imitation of me.... etc etc etc]. This all inevitably leads to us making fun of my poor dad... which always brings up the famous quote "Do you remember that one time dad made like 2 noodles of spaghetti for dinner?!" Then we all laugh and quote like that. Eventually the conversation mellows down and my brothers go to play video games while my sister and I stay and talk to our parents until I get bored and join my brothers. Eventually someone clears the table... but that's our least favorite part of dinner. My theory is that we don't dread it necessarily because clearing the table is work, but because it marks the end of that perfectionary family time.

Spiritual Thoughts:

1. This earth we live on is incredible. God is most definitely an amazing artist. He gave us this beautiful earth because He loves us so dearly.

2. Conference was this weekend. WOW! Need I say more? I noticed a common theme about families this weekend for conference. [For all of you non-morms reading this, I'm talking about General Conference right now. This is when the leaders of our church speak to everyone about the issues of today.] It is so important in this world where the family is under attack for us all to work together to keep this sacred organization in tact. It is so important for mothers and fathers to set a good example for their children and to teach them about the gospel. As the world spirals further and further into destruction, it is important that families stay strong and at the forefront of God's army, fighting off temptation of the adversary.

Public Service Announcement:

In my biology class we'e talking about our stewardship over the earth. PLEASE RECYCLE AND DON'T WASTE WATER!!! 80% of the junk in landfills could be recycled! We will kill this earth if we don't watch ourselves. And about the water. People don't realize how lucky we are to have water. Don't leave th sink running. That is such a waste. People in other countries would kill to have clean water like us.

Silly Thoughts:

This isn't a thought.. more of an event.

April fools day was quite an event for me and one of my proudest moments. Two of my friends and I [macey and haylee] moved our other friend's [sarah] room into the bathroom while she was out. posters. bed. rug. clothes. recycle-ables. computer. books. schoolwork. backpack. jewelry. hair stuff. clothes. shoes. and even her refrigerator. We set up her room in the shower area. IT BLEW HER MIND! and also the minds of the other girls in the hall. everyone came to see our work because it was rather impressive:)

End of Thoughts:

bye.